Wednesday, November 4, 2009

My Holy Spirit Experience

I’ve decide to put a face and a story to my message about the Holy Spirit….For the past 3 months or so I had noticed that I had been getting increasingly angry almost by the day. I didn’t know what was making me lash out at those who I love most. My wife Teresa was one of those who was getting the worst of it….folks please believe me when I tell you that this woman means everything to me…we have been married for 24 years, and unfortunately she has seen me loose more and more of my health over the past 14 years. She has been the perfect spouse, because I expected (in my own mind) early on in my decline she might get tired of dealing with my health problems, but she has been by my side every step of the way.

I had gotten real irritated with my children and anybody who would even try to talk to me. And the worse thing to ask me was “what’s wrong”. About 3 weeks ago I thought I had reached the end of my life. I definitely felt like I was done trying to live each day with the same pain and depression. I posted on my “Facebook” an announcement that I have had enough, that I wanted to die. A few of my friends had called to see if I was OK and I would just go through the motions of telling them all was OK, but it wasn’t.

It was one afternoon that I felt like something inside me was telling me that things will get better…then I got a message from my wife’s niece Robin and all of a sudden it all came pouring out of me…I felt her religious conviction reassuring me that I could tell her anything. I cried for what felt like hours….all of the pain, the frustration, the feeling of being stuck with my health issues were all surfacing all at once. The more I talked to robin the more I felt like the Holy Spirit was convincing me that she was to be my spiritual guide, that she would not judge me but help me to understand what scriptures and stories from the bible will enforce my spiritual needs to fight off my physical failures.

In the course of our first conversation Robin had committed to me that she would always be there for me until I found my religion. I’ve known her for about 25 years, but in the course of just a few weeks she has become the sister I never had. She helps me to interpret my feels and the messages I feel I have been getting from a higher source.

I believe that the Holy Spirit is active in me…when I am down and lack the energy to even stand that he tells me that Jesus is there to make sure I will not fall. He (the Holy Spirit) has also told me that Robin will get me where I can stand on my own and be at a place where my faith will focus my spiritual needs.

I can’t thank Teresa or Robin enough…they are both my angels with very different roles. Teresa is the strength of my physical life and Robin is the strength of my spiritual journey.

I believe that the Holy Spirit and our Savior recruit those we need to help us along with our journey. The Holy Spirit certainly knew I had received my lowest point and help me build my spiritual confidence to move forward with Robin.

12 comments:

  1. He truly is the Comforter, and He knows our every need. To that end, I'm thankful he brought helpers into your life to enrich it.

    Glad you feel His presence...

    XO,

    Sheila :-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I was taught that the Holy Spirit is the love of the Father for the Son and the Son for the Father.
    I am glad you are finding your solace in The Trinity.
    QMM

    ReplyDelete
  3. It's usually when we feel we are at the end of our rope, that we find God was waiting there all along, He's always on time! No doubt that the Holy Spirit used Robin, who is full of compassion, and a total servant of the Lord, to be there in your time of need. I also praise God for Teresa & your marriage, that it has endured the test of time.

    I was reading this Scripture today and I will pray it over you as well. Colossians 1:9-11 "...I ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding: that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, for all patience and longsuffering with joy."

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mike, I've been thinking about your post ever since I read it earlier today. I have to say that I felt really sad. We are your family, and I am sorry that you were at such a point, and we had not helped you. I think we could all do better about being supportive and accepting of each other. Things shouldn't have to get so bad.

    Please know how much I love you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thank you for sharing this moving experience with us. God certainly does know what each one of us needs and if we search for him with all our hearts we will find him, as the scripture teaches. He is there waiting all the time for us to turn to him. I'm so thankful that you did just that.
    Blessings,
    Charlotte

    ReplyDelete
  6. I think dealing with pain is one of the most difficult things to face. I love the fact that God is so intimate with us. He knew what you needed and sent Robin at the right time to be an encourager to you and to your faith.

    Yesterday morning I read a quote by Paul Tripp that really spoke to me. He said this:

    "Throughout the course of your life, you are shaped and directed by how you respond to the pain on your path. We all know that suffering can be the soil in which saints and heroes grow but it can also be fertile ground for criminals and cowards. How is your life being shaped, not just by what you are suffering, but by how you have chosen to deal with it?...." He then says we often "really don't want to live in the personal cummunion of faith with the Messiah. We don't want to have to rely on his wisdom, his provision, his grace, and his strength. We don't want questions, dilemmas, obstacles, and mysteries in our lives. We want our lives to be comfortable and predictable. But what God wants is us. He wants us in a living devotion and dependence on him. God is not working on constructing the best life for us; he is working on reconstructing us, so he speaks to us in ways that call us to rely humbly on his active presence and his gracious love."

    I have found all of that to be so true. Also when I went through a lengthly time of pain, I found the book by Mike Mason to be a very helpful devotional. It is called: "The Gospel According to Job: an honest look at pain and doubt form the life of one who lost everything." I got it on Amazon. It is written by a guy who suffered from unrelenting pain and it is so very helpful. What I liked about it too is that each chapter is very short--ie just a few pages--so you can read a bit each day and be given some help and something to really reflect on.

    May God richly bless you with his ongoing presence and His fellowship and his strength to face all that you are experiencing. He is called the God of all Comfort and boy, I am so thankful for his grace and mercy.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am so glad that I stopped by today Mike and read your heartfelt post. It is so true that the Lord knew we would need MANY wonderful people in our lives, each with very different roles, to lean on and learn and grow from. Whatever would we do without each other?
    It made me think of this verse...Ecc 4:10 "For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, For he has no one to help him up"...Woe indeed. How sad would it be not to have another trusted friend in our times of trial and tribulation. But I was also thinking how wonderful it is that we have the best friend and help we could ever hope for. Pro 18:24... "But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." Jesus is always there for us, always loves us unconditionally, and always has our ultimate good in His heart..Jer 29:11 ""For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." I LOVE that verse and have clung to it many many times over the course of my life as things seemed to be out of control. He has a future and a hope for us. I have recently discovered that I have a very advanced case of arthritis in both of my knees. This has caused me not only a great deal of pain but also a great difficulity in doing many of things I not only want to do but feel like I should be doing. But I can honestly tell you that during this season in my life I have grown closer to Him and developed an even bigger dependency on Him just to get through my days. But the Lord is ever faithful. He always meets our needs if we but ask. I am so glad to hear about your journey and will pray for you as you travel on your road to an even closer walk with Him. Many blessings to you, Debbie

    ReplyDelete
  8. Mike I want to say "Amen" to the encouraging words left here on your blog by others. Thank you for posting. If I can be of help in any way, call on me.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Thank-you for your testimony. I'm so happy that your a part of our Spiritual Sundays. I will pray for you Mike.
    God Bless,
    Ginger

    ReplyDelete
  10. I pray that the Lord will guide you and protect you as you grow in His likeness. God bless.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Mike, your words reflect the feelings and hearts of many that are hurting today. I pray you now know that the Holy Spirit is moving in your heart, and in the hearts of those that love you, that care about you, and that you aren't alone...you never were, but that old enemy that constantly steals our joy and hope can be convincing with his lies. Remember that it is a lie! The truth is that you are a child of Almight God, grafted in through the blood of Jesus...that is no small matter...that is everything! There is nothing so great that can separate us from Him. I do understand that constant pain is not easy to live with, and affects not only you, but the family as well. You have been given a wonderful wife that understands that, and has proven her love is true. You are blessed, and I pray that with Robin's counsel, you will find the comfort and peace that comes from the heart of God through others. After reading all these comments, I really hope that you know that there are people that care and will always be here for you when in need...we all need that from time to time, and I know you will be there for them too.

    God bless,
    Mary

    ReplyDelete